Here is my #fridayflash short shory.
The Third Attempt to Take the Teddy
“Justyna, can I take Abrateddy to school?” Kamilka, a superfirst grade student, asked her mom while putting on her shoes with winter soles.
Mom was surprised by this sudden question, her daughter had stopped playing with the Abrateddy teddy bear around the time when she began to crawl. The teddy spent its time doing nothing on the top of the one closet where nobody wanted to clean. The Storczyks were to move to a bigger apartment as soon as dad got his promotion, which might not happen too quickly, because he was a schlemiel and worked in a field were schlemiels had no chance – in the toy industry.
The question went unanswered, because Justyna forgot she didn’t pack the juice for herself and Kamilka, and apart from that, she couldn’t find either one of her cell phones.
Soon everything was as always. Only the schlemiel dad noticed that Abrateddy didn’t breathe the dust on the top of the closet, but under the bed.
“She’s hiding the bear under the bed, maybe there’s something wrong with her?” He asked his wife, but both of them were getting ready to watch the “72 Hours” tv series, and then the neighbor rang and said he would call the cops if they were going to watch “72” too loudly again.
“Marcin, can I take the bear to school?” Two weeks later Kamilka was much more decisive.
“You know Kamila that children in the superfirst and higher grades are not allowed to bring any toys to school, with the exception of the contracted by the school board developmental Onagonoshi devices, and I can’t give you permission.”
“But Marcin, you designed this bear! You made it yourself and you’re not proud of it? Please give me my teddy. I must!” Kamilka begged, and a small tear was shining in the corner of her eye, which she purposefully turned towards her dad, but since he was a schlemiel, he didn’t notice.
“I designed it myself, and I’m very proud that my almost grown-up daughter wants to play with it, and I will play with you, but I can’t let you take it to school. Oh, look, see how nicely it still holds together? We made it to last only two years, and here, just look at this!” Marcin admired his handiwork.
The third time was extreme. Kamilka screamed and refused to go and kept saying she was sick and wanted to stay with Abrateddy, and that her parents could go to work and leave her at home, because she had a fever and a lower body paralysis, which you couldn’t see.
“Kamila, please be reasonable if you want your friend Bryzia to visit you.”
Bryzia didn’t visit, because Kamilka stayed home that day and instead Justyna spoke with the teacher. She didn’t find out anything other than her daughter had been picked on and laughed at by other kids.
“And that’s it? The end?” Marcin the schlemiel asked, “I’m going to have words with this Miss Malwina. What does she think? I’m gonna tell her!”
“Yeah, you’re gonna tell her,” Justyna added angrily and went back to doing overdue homework, superfirst grade, second semester.
The reason for the teddybear desperation was discovered purely by accident in the same hallway, where just a few days ago Kamilka’s last stand took place. A friend of hers came over, but not Bryzia, because she was mad she couldn’t come the other day, but Michalinka, who immediately after stepping in said to Justyna:
“Excuse me! But why hasn’t Kamilka started to write a blog yet?”
Writer Updated 
Well, this was interesting, although it needs some work. What I like about it is the undercurrent of humor — Kamilka's increasing fits over the teddy bear, and the fact that the dad is a schmiel. That kinda cracked me up.
I'll be interested to see what else you come up with on #flashfriday!
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Well, this was interesting, although it needs some work. What I like about it is the undercurrent of humor — Kamilka's increasing fits over the teddy bear, and the fact that the dad is a schmiel. That kinda cracked me up.
I'll be interested to see what else you come up with on #flashfriday!
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Thanks for the comment. I'll try to submit something more in my style (tech, tech, tech) next week:-)
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Thanks for the comment. I'll try to submit something more in my style (tech, tech, tech) next week:-)
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"because she had a fever and a lower body paralysis, which you couldn’t see" – LOVE this line!
I like the story – the idea is wonderful and the characters endearing, but I don't really understand the end, why would she need the teddy bear to start a blog? I hope I didn't miss anything.
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"because she had a fever and a lower body paralysis, which you couldn’t see" – LOVE this line!
I like the story – the idea is wonderful and the characters endearing, but I don't really understand the end, why would she need the teddy bear to start a blog? I hope I didn't miss anything.
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If you're running into problems you need sth you feel safe with – like a teddy. A pressure a girl had in school (everybody around had a blog) was a big problem. I can imagine that, my daughter was getting crazy when we were late with buying her a latest version of Tamagothi;-)
You're right, the ending is not clear on that.
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If you're running into problems you need sth you feel safe with – like a teddy. A pressure a girl had in school (everybody around had a blog) was a big problem. I can imagine that, my daughter was getting crazy when we were late with buying her a latest version of Tamagothi;-)
You're right, the ending is not clear on that.
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If you're running into problems you need sth you feel safe with – like a teddy. A pressure a girl had in school (everybody around had a blog) was a big problem. I can imagine that, my daughter was getting crazy when we were late with buying her a latest version of Tamagothi;-) You're right, the ending is not clear on that.
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If you're running into problems you need sth you feel safe with – like a teddy. A pressure a girl had in school (everybody around had a blog) was a big problem. I can imagine that, my daughter was getting crazy when we were late with buying her a latest version of Tamagothi;-) You're right, the ending is not clear on that.
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I must admit I got a little confused. Your explanation helps out quite a bit. The father actyally turned out to be rather perceptive after all despite being a schlemiel. “She’s hiding the bear under the bed, maybe there’s something wrong with her?” He asked his wife…"
Welcome to #fridayflash.
~jon
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I must admit I got a little confused. Your explanation helps out quite a bit. The father actyally turned out to be rather perceptive after all despite being a schlemiel. “She’s hiding the bear under the bed, maybe there’s something wrong with her?” He asked his wife…"
Welcome to #fridayflash.
~jon
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