“He is normally abnormal!” Clarisse (name on ID: Paul) said while biting into an unidentified piece of seafood hors d’oeuvre.
“Who’s that?” Jonofi (name on ID: John) asked.
“That Robert. Can you believe that he’s never in his life done amnesa?”
“No! The dude is really wack. How you know him?” Onardo (name on ID: Leon) wanted to know.
“Unfortunately we work together, he in stocks, me in funds. The dude admitted that he tried weed once back in school. And that’s all.”
“Who are you hanging out with, Clarisette?” Onardo groaned.
“My sympathy,” Jonofi added and just for practice took a shot of amnesa from the cheese-and-drugs board.
And Kudupi (name on ID: Kudupi) just sat, smoked plimon and said nothing. He was like that – he wanted to have the big moment all for himself.
They ordered a round of Just Another Reason to Get Hard Drugs (whisky with ice). The evening at the Stop Deviation restaurant was promising to be a hot one.
“But you know what, this is nothing. Recently I met a guy at a party over at San Barenakedino’s.”
“Oh yeah? San Barenakedino? How’s he?” Clarisse and Onardo both asked.
“Normal. Crashed his car, and is banging Lora in Drojeda. But not about him, only about this one sackless Jacek. Posing as a normales, too, that asstard.’
“How?” Kudupi asked and everyone suddenly noticed.
“Yo Kud, wassup? You’re talking?” Clarissesetto said.
“A momentary lack of brain power,” Kudupi hissed quietly, took a shot of chrynine and washed it down with his drink, “So?”
“What so? So, this Jacek, he walks around and says he has only one woman.”
“No, I tell ya, and then he says who that woman is…”
“I can’t listen to this. Don’t! Stop!” Onardo snorted, because he liked to snort from time to time.
“But you know!”
“We know, we know. Don’t ruin the evening, Jonofi. Do they have kids already?” Kudupi asked a trick question.
“No, now I’m not playing! I wasn’t supposed to say, and you, Kudu, now you said it for real, so I’m not playing. This wasn’t supposed to be like this, why do you always have to bring everything back to a phallus, huh!”
“Either way, disgusting. How can these people have the balls to walk the streets? I dunno.”
“Totally cukoo,” Kudupi began and they all knew he was about to drop the bomb.
“Just be careful with the detonation range, cuz I just had a stuffed snout with gorgonzola,” Clarissesettessimo laughed. Everybody liked Kudupi’s stories. They were always the randiest and broke every taboo.
“So, c’mon Kudu! You started, you finish!” Jonofi was getting impatient.
“The dude’s name is Michal, and he’s a noob like I’ve never met before,” Kudu slowly drawled his words with care and precision, like “cision” in the word “precision”. The climax was inevitably coming soon, and the group at the table next to theirs was all ears, too, in the anticipation of a pathologically deviant story.
“?” Jonofi stared.
“??” Clarissesesettisimoprimo stared.
“?!” Onardo, supported by the fixated eyes from the table next to theirs, tried to force a quick answer.
“Do you know what time this doofus has breakfast?” Kudu began to build the suspense, aided by a gulp of tatamamina.
“At eight in the morning.”
It took both tables almost three sessions of medium sized cheese-and-drugs boards to collect themselves after hearing this.
Finally, the orchestra of trained zoo employees managed to clear the atmosphere full of feelings of disgust caused the pathology of living in a big city.